Thursday, April 30, 2009

A-22A has Arrived!

Well gang, I know it’s been a while. What can I say? I’ve been busy. 

So let’s catch up. The smoking thing . . . kind of went to hell in an ashtray. Lots on the plate right now, fixing up the home to sell, wife was away for three weeks, blah, blah, blah. I know, excuses. 

Most troubling, however, was the fact that my blood sugar rose due to all of the combined stress. Oh, have I mentioned I’m a Type 2 diabetic? Well, I am. And stress has a pretty negative effect on the sugar levels. A real catch-22 there. Diabetics shouldn’t smoke . . . quitting raises sugar levels. 

Well, we’ll work on that one later. 

Right now, we have the relocation thing to deal with. Yes, the RCMP form A-22A has arrived. It is official, we are supposed to be in Thompson, Manitoba, in 90 days. And that means we must sell the house, take a house-hunting trip to Thompson and then move to that lovely Hub of the North in 90 days. 

Noooo problem. 

And to make our move as easy and stress-free as possible, the RCMP has provided a handy 105-page document outlining the RCMP Integrated Relocation Program (IRP). (Oh, and I should point out that, after reading through the IRP, I realize that acronyms will be a major part of my life for the next 90 days or so. Bear with me (BWM)). 

So the next step, which my wife is taking care of as I write, is to contact the Relocation Reviewer. After that, we register with the CRSP (Contracted Relocation Service Provider) and then it’s game on!. From what I understand, there is a forest of paperwork involved in every step of the process. Yeehaw! 

So that’s where we are today. I am painting baseboard and trim today, in addition to keeping the young ‘uns out of the paint, fed and watered. It’s raining, the yard is wet and muddy, as is the dog. I have a 105-page guide to read for fun, while the boys sleep. 

TTFN and I will try to write a little more regularly, and keep you all abreast of the IRP. LOL. (WTF?)
Posted by Neodada at 16:53:17 | Permalink | No Comments »

Friday, April 3, 2009

Two steps forward, one step back

Well good morning and welcome to day two. It’s 6:30 a.m. and I have one day under my belt as a non-smoker and I’m feeling good about it.


I’m not sure why, but I feel strongest in the morning. It’s a surprise to me, but it’s good because it gets me out of bed. Well, Sonwun usually gets me out of bed, but you know what I mean.


Yesterday was rough. But yesterday is over. 


The wife picked up my crutch last night when she went to work. It’s made by the Nicorette people, but it’s not the gum. As I mentioned previously, it’s a plastic cigarette-like thingy. You put a nicotine-spiked cartridge in it and puff away like you would a cigarette.


I don’t want to use it. It’s my last resort. I want all the nicotine out of my body A.S.A.P. And I want my body to get used to it. But, if I feel I am failing, or the stress gets to be too much, I’d rather grab this thing than a cigarette. And the cool thing is, I can smoke this in the house, as there is no smoke. Ha ha.


—


Okay, it’s now 8:22 a.m. and the panicky feelings are back. I’m angry, I’m edgy and the dog’s life is again in jeopardy. There are dishes to do, so I should go do them. I really, really want a cigarette.


—


And now it’s the morning of Day 3. Had a slip this morning, but I remain committed to this. I remain committed to saving the money and maintaining my health. I am told slips are expected. But they are nonetheless disappointing. I refuse to let this defeat me. There are no more cigarettes in the house. The wife has gone off for her laser therapy and, as I write this, she is undergoing the process. I hope to heck it works for her. As for myself, I have my crutch at the ready.


To be honest, I didn’t want to use my crutch, but it beats buying smokes. And it beats smoking. So I will be using it. Bear with me folks, this will be a process, but one I intend to win. For those of you out there who have kicked the habit, my hat is off to you. I will be one of you soon.


Yes, one minor setback, but in my mind, I am already a non-smoker.

Posted by Neodada at 17:06:40 | Permalink | No Comments »

Wednesday, April 1, 2009

Today, it just kinda sucks

Well it’s day one. I don’t like it. But it’s the way it must be, right? You smoke for 20 years or so and quitting cold turkey can be a bitch. Scratch that. It is a bitch.


The feeling is a little like panic, or at least fear. A hollow in the chest, edgy, a bit of cold sweat. I feel a need to stay busy, chew a carrot, type, keep my hands and mouth busy. I am struggling to maintain an even keel with Sonwun and Sontoo. It is, after all, not their fault.


The dog is locked in a small room away from me. It is for her own protection. It snowed like hell last night. When I let the dog out, she found the only patch of dirt on the snowy planet and went digging. When she came in, she left paw prints all over the kitchen. Not the right day. Not the dog’s fault. But, for her own protection . . .


Oh, and did I mention that, due to all this snow, the satellite’s out? The kids, are therefore more underfoot than usual. 


Say it with me, not their fault, not their fault, not their fault.


I guess this will become the diary of a madman for a little while, at least until this feeling decreases in frequency. Right now I can’t think about anything other than a cigarette and how good it would feel to light one up. This is clearly a little of the physical, but mostly the psychological struggle with quitting. I’ve gone longer without a cigarette, but I wasn’t worried about another coming. Now I’m struggling with the fact that I will never get another. 


On the positive side, when I first got up this morning I was feeling strong. I was actually looking forward to the pain and fighting it. I was up for winning. Man, things change quickly. Right now, I’m just as edgy as hell.


I wish it was a nice day out. It would be nice to go for a walk, get some fresh air. But I’m trapped in the damn house.


Anyway, this is entry one of what will be many on the joys of nicotine withdrawal. I know in the end it will all be worthwhile. I know I’ll save money, I know it’s better for my health and it is a better example for my two young sons. So wish me luck folks, cause right now it just kinda sucks.

Posted by Neodada at 15:18:51 | Permalink | No Comments »